Monday, 6 April 2015

Saying Goodbye Too Soon

  Like most of you, I have women in my family tree who had to live through the loss of one or more of their children.
  My paternal Grandmother, Mary Baker Hudson (1920-2910) buried a baby girl who only lived a few hours.
Grave of the Infant Daughter of
 Benjamin Allen Hudson (1918-1976) and Mary (Baker) Hudson (1920-2010)
Sumter Cemetery, Sumter, South Carolina 
Azile Juanita (Daughrity) Roberts Sullivan (1921-2009), my maternal Grandmother received a phone call that no mother wants to get as she learned of the death of her grown son, Gilbert Earnest Roberts, Jr. (1944-1999).

Grave of Gilbert Ernest Roberts, Jr.
Quaker Cemetery, Camden, Kershaw, South Carolina

Paternal Great Grandmother, Beulah Mae (Price) Roberts (1897-1980), survived 6 of her 12 children. Three dying in infancy and three dying in WWII.

Funeral of Roberts Brother's Killed in WWII

 Frances Virginia (McRady) McManus (1856-1903), Great Great Grandmother on my maternal side, buried her twin girls a month apart and then went on to lose two more of her children and a beloved grandchild.
Death Notice of Grandson Amos
Sumter Southron and Watchman, 9 April, 1902

  This list goes on and on as one goes back in time. Their stories sad and heartbreaking. As these life experiences are discovered my heart reaches out to them wondering how they kept going, How did the mundane tasks of every day get done?  How did they go on?

 These questions I am now asking of myself. For you see, as of this past weekend, I am joining the ranks of women who have been faced with the enormous trial of losing a child. My 12-year-old son has been diagnosed with a brain stem tumor.
 Cancer. Inoperable. Terminal.

 With the great examples before me, I will go on. There are others to take care of including myself. A child to show a lifetime of love to and make memories with.

 Wonderful family and friends will be there to support and sustain me in what will be one of the hardest trials any parent can face.
 Learning how to say goodbye too soon.





  1. I am so sorry you are going thru this. I cannot imagine the pain you must feel. My very young daughter in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer three years ago and our time with her is running out. I am so sad for her and her family but yet so frightened for my son at the same time. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. I have no answers....only questions and grief. Thank you for sharing.

  2. Such tragic news, hugs and love to your family.

  3. Wow. I am so sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this. I hope the joy and memories you have had so far and plan for the time to come make it bearable. My grandma outlived her parents, siblings, her husband, her son, and grandson. She inspired me with her positive attitude and I believe you have her same spirit. Enjoy the time you have with him. My prayers are with you all.

  4. Cheri,
    I am so very sorry to read this post. My heart breaks for you and my prayers go out to you and your family. Sadly I too have buried a child. My oldest daughter was 22 years old when she died. It was completely unexpected. A total shock.
    I know mere words can't help but the love and support of family and friends will help tremendously. Hold tight to your faith and know you're not alone.
    I pray these upcoming days and months are filled with special moments that you can hold onto. If ever you need a listening ear please contact me. You're in my heart and prayers. ~ Cindy

  5. Oh Cheryl, that's devastating news. It is made all the more difficult because it is out of the natural order of life - a child leaving before his parents. And because as mother's our inherent instinct is to protect our children yet this is beyond what you are able to "fix" and make better. Let the memories sustain you in your deepest darkness. It won't be enough to know that others have gone through it. It will still be unbearable. But please know others are willing to hold you up and save you from slipping into the deep abyss of grief. Reach out. Don't be afraid to let others know you need a hug, a shoulder or a hand to hold.
    My deepest most heartfelt sympathies to you accompany prayers for strength and a peaceful heart.

  6. Cheryl ~ Our lives are truly fragile and we have no idea what each day holds . . . my heart, prayers and thoughts are with you and your family and know that we are here for you at any time.

  7. Prayers for you and your family Cheri.

  8. Cheri, what devastating news. Your son is so fortunate to have a Mum such as you to be with him on this journey. My prayers and thoughts are with you and your famy as you face this.

  9. Cheri, what devastating news. Your son is so fortunate to have a Mum such as you to be with him on this journey. My prayers and thoughts are with you and your famy as you face this.

  10. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at what is and will be a very difficult time. It is so contrary to how the world should work. Cancer and everything associated with it is just heartbreaking. You certainly have wonderful examples in your family history and you will take each day as it comes. Live and love with purpose and be there for each other. Know that we keep your family in our hearts.

  11. Cheri,
    Words are insufficient... My thoughts and prayers go to you and your family... May you find comfort and peace in the little moments of every day and in the memories you hold dear in your heart...

  12. I have put together a fundraiser for anyone who wishes to donate. We are truly grateful for all the love and support.

  13. Cheri having met you earlier this year I am sure you will make some great memories with your son however short your time with him may be. Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily lives we forget to do the things that we love. We are fortunate today in that we can capture many of these moments on film and video unlike our ancestors who just had their memories. Learn to love each day as it comes so you can make the most of each one and celebrate the joy that your family has experienced having your son in their lives.

  14. Dear Cheri, what can one say to you, faced with such dreadful news. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  15. Cheri, I have just started reading blogs. I am so sorry for what you are facing. Sharing this shows such bravery. I hope you find comfort in knowing so many others care.

  16. Cheri, I'm so very, very sorry, and will keep your family in my prayers through this journey.

  17. That you can even write this and share this horrible news in such a beautiful way shows what you are made of. Your family will be in prayers every day.

  18. Cheri, I am stunned and saddened by your news. My heart goes out to you and your family. You are in my prayers.

  19. Prayers for strength during this time for you and the family. Peace.


Hello, thanks for leaving a comment on the World Wide Genealogy Blog. All comments are moderated because of pesky spammers!

Best wishes
World Wide Genealogy Team